Ego

Had a tough work at week, working 15 hour days and was very stressed and frazzled by the end of the week. It's taking me a lot of time to unwind. I went off at a guy at work in a bad way, I felt on the edge....I also said something very unkind to a fellow Aunkai member tonight, it was very wrong and I hurt him by what I said. I have along way to go before I am the man I want to be...my ego is very strong, but me ego tells me it isn't very strong but it is.... I care greatly about people say or think about me, I have to let it all go, none of it matters. I need to have a big heart, I need to open it and look to where I can help and be good to be people..
I have to stop looking for ways to feed the never ending appetite that is my ego. Being a man and a Bujutsuka means that I have to take responsibility for the change and make it now, no more excuses... I want to be the man, that dreamed about being when I was a boy .